One Country Dates In Groups For Months, The Other Decides By Dessert

🇹🇼 Taiwan vs 🇨🇴 Colombia — Dating and Social Scene

By Suki Nakamura, Out of Office

Dating culture is where a country's true relationship with time and directness comes out, no euphemisms allowed. Taiwan approaches romance with a cautious, almost bureaucratic patience — group outings, gradual signals, weeks or months before anything resembling a defined relationship gets named out loud. Colombia, by contrast, moves with a warmth and speed that can feel dizzying to anyone raised on slower courtship norms — compliments flow freely in the street, affection is declared early and often, and ambiguity is treated as something to be resolved quickly rather than savored.

I have spent three separate group dinners in Taipei with the same lovely, painfully polite man before either of us admitted we liked each other, by which point I'd learned his entire family history and approximately none of his intentions, and I have had a stranger in Medellín call me "mi reina" within the first ninety seconds of a conversation, which felt, at the time, both absurd and completely disarming.

Do's & Don'ts

Taiwan

Colombia

Taiwan: Patience As Courtship Strategy

Dating in Taiwan operates on a deliberate, unhurried timeline that can baffle anyone used to faster-moving Western dating norms. The default entry point isn't a one-on-one date at all — it's typically a group outing, often organized loosely through mutual friends, where interested parties can observe each other in a low-stakes social setting before anyone commits to anything resembling individual pursuit. This isn't shyness dressed up as strategy; it's a genuinely valued cultural pattern that treats romantic decisions as ones worth taking slowly, with input, implicit or explicit, from a wider social circle.

Once individual interest is established, communication tends to remain understated for a while longer. Small gestures — remembering a preference, showing up with a thoughtful, minor gift, offering to help with something mundane — often carry more romantic weight than direct verbal declarations, which can feel almost too blunt within Taiwanese courtship norms. Foreigners accustomed to explicit "so, are we dating?" conversations often find themselves confused for weeks about where they actually stand, mistaking careful, patient interest for disinterest or ambiguity, when in fact the process is simply unfolding on its own culturally normal timeline.

Family and friend networks remain genuinely influential throughout this process too — introducing a potential partner to your close friend group isn't a late-stage relationship milestone here, it's often an early, almost diagnostic step, since Taiwanese social circles frequently weigh in, subtly, on whether a match seems suitable. Dating apps exist and are used, particularly among younger urban Taiwanese, but they tend to function as one entry point among several rather than a replacement for social-circle introductions, which retain real cultural weight. The overall effect is a dating culture that rewards patience, attentiveness to subtlety, and a willingness to let things develop without forcing definition too early — deeply uncomfortable for the impatient, deeply rewarding for anyone willing to actually slow down.

Colombia: Warmth, Speed, and Zero Patience For Ambiguity

Colombian dating culture, particularly in cities like Bogotá, Medellín, and Cartagena, runs almost diametrically opposite to Taiwan's measured pace. Interest is expressed early, often verbally, sometimes theatrically — piropos, the tradition of complimenting strangers in the street, remain a genuine cultural fixture, generally understood locally as good-natured rather than threatening, though context, tone, and setting all matter considerably in how any individual instance actually lands. Visitors unfamiliar with the custom sometimes misread its intent in either direction, either taking offense where none was intended or reading too much into what's essentially social flourish.

Once actual romantic interest develops, Colombian dating tends to move fast by comparison with more reserved cultures. Physical affection is expressed openly and early, declarations of interest come without much hedging, and meeting a partner's family can happen considerably sooner than in slower-paced dating cultures — often read locally as a natural, positive step rather than a weighty milestone requiring months of buildup first. This directness extends to clarifying relationship status too; ambiguity isn't treated as romantic or exciting here, it's treated as something to resolve quickly, and asking directly where things stand is completely normal rather than presumptuous.

Social dating itself often incorporates dancing as a completely unremarkable, common activity — salsa, vallenato, reggaeton, depending on region and generation — treated as a legitimate first date or group social setting rather than a special-occasion skill reserved for weddings. This physical, expressive comfort extends the broader Colombian social warmth into romantic contexts specifically: affection, compliments, and enthusiasm are default settings, not signals reserved for deep intimacy. For newcomers used to more restrained courtship norms, the adjustment isn't learning to be more reserved, but learning that warmth this immediate and direct doesn't necessarily signal more than it appears to — it's simply the baseline register, and reading too much or too little into it both miss the mark.

The Verdict

Taiwan wins if you value depth built slowly, courtship that takes social context seriously, and small gestures over grand declarations. Colombia wins if you'd rather know exactly where you stand within the first week, expressed loudly, warmly, and without a single moment of ambiguous hedging to overanalyze afterward with friends.

Neither pace is objectively correct, though I'll admit a preference for knowing where I stand sooner rather than later, which puts me, reluctantly, in Colombia's corner on this one. Taiwan asks for patience most Western daters have never had to develop. Colombia asks for comfort with directness most Western daters claim to want and then panic over the moment they actually get it.

What Nobody Warned You About

expat.com Taiwan forum — a foreigner described attending four separate group dinners with the same person before either admitted romantic interest, calling it "the longest slow burn of my entire life, and also somehow completely normal here."

expat.com Colombia forum — someone recounted being invited to meet a partner's entire extended family after three weeks of dating, and said it felt fast until every local friend confirmed that was completely standard.

Quora — a visitor asked how to respond to piropos on the street, and the top answer suggested simply: "A smile and keep walking is fine. Ignoring it entirely is fine too. Just don't assume it means more than it usually does."

Conclusion

Taiwan and Colombia have both built entirely coherent dating cultures, they've just made opposite bets on what romance should feel like — one treats patience and subtlety as evidence of seriousness, the other treats speed and directness as evidence of the same thing. Show up in Taipei expecting Colombian bluntness and you'll seem alarming. Show up in Bogotá expecting Taiwanese patience and you'll seem cold, possibly uninterested, and definitely confusing to everyone involved. Learn which register you're in before your first date, not during it.